Things ain't complicated

Things are not that complicated. We always want to complicate things. Life is about to find reasons for everything happens. But sometimes, it just happens. May be just because of your hormone. It sounds silly but it is just the way the chemicals control our mood. We do have a choice. But sometimes we are unconscious.

We are so tiny. I mean human.

If I would super enjoy myself, then I should super enjoy myself.
If I would super influence people, then I should super influence people.
If I would fly, then I should fly.

Attitude Problem

I think I have an attitude problem. Especially to my loved one. Someone I take it for granted. I think I am too defensive to opinions. This due to some of the following reasons.

It always comes to not enough confident. We always are in competition. We compare our jobs, our power, our IQ... We also compare our children's talent, skills... Anything you can think of. Is it sad we always define our value by using the ruler to measure and compare with others? We are in a society of competition. We always want to win. We always be result oriented. What's the point? Aren't our values are measured by who we are as a person?

Are we always have to be either right or wrong? It just likes we are counting the losses and the wins all the time. Can we understand each other and try to find something in common? Can we really be open and listen to differences? Sometime we are so afraid to be wrong or take risks and we lose tons of opportunities to express ourselves, our love to someone, stand up for our values and belief. Moreover, we become defensive when we listen to opinions as we always want to be the one who is right. The funniest thing is that we won't let other people win! The only person to win is ME!

There is attitude problem when we are in inertia. I always want to code the Isaac Newton's First Law of Motion:

"Every body perseveres in its state of being at rest or of moving uniformly straight ahead, except insofar as it is compelled to change its state by forces impressed."

Are we strong enough to embrace changes? Do we really need a push to change? Ha Ha. Sometime, we are just so used to be comfortable in these world. We don't take initiative enough and give some burst to new actions. We like stuck in a bed of sand and don't want to move even we see the world is changing and moving. The saddest part is that we pretend we don't know.

It reminds me the lyric from a song of Dixie Chicks "Landslide"

"Can I sail thru the changing ocean tides?
Can I handle the seasons of my life"

May be I just have to remind myself that I should be grateful of what I have and who I am. Embrace it.

He/She Wants

"I want to be healthy."
"I want to be beautiful."
"I want to look fit."
"I want to have money."
"I want to travel the world."
"I want to have children."
"I want my children happy."
"I want my children smart."
"I want my children healthy."
"I want to have friends."
"I want to be happy."
"I want to be respected."
"I want to have good shape."
"I want to have some good music."
"I want to be stand out in the crowd."
"I want to be watched."
"I want to be noticed."
"I want to be right."
"I want to be significant."
"I want to be loved."
"I want to be supported."
"I want to be understood."
"I want comfort."
"I want to help people."
"I want to play."
"I want to have fun."
"I want to be hilarious."
"I want to dance."
"I want to have opportunity."
"I want to learn."
"I want to be fairly treated."
"I want to relax."
"I want to be knowledgeable."
"I want to have good skin."
"I want to have thick hair."
"I want to love."

Reality

I can say I am an ideologist. I love to be optimistic but sometimes I hate it. Because sometimes I let the good future vision delude my understanding of situation. That hampers me from making good decision.

The hardest thing to do is to face the brutal facts with clarity in adverse situation but at the same time keep the optimist faith in future.

Something I have to remind myself about reality thinking:
1. Do look for the data as much as you can.
2. See actions but not speak.
3. Don't avoid facts.
4. Welcome differences.

Opinions

In this informative era, there are so much information. From web, TV, books, radio, magazines... I can just say that there are too much. Not only this, people make tons of comments about anything.

So if someone makes comment on what you are doing, will you take it seriously? What are the values of these comments? I think most of them have not much values.

The thing is no one knows better than yourself. No one can judge you or tell you what you should do. Not because they are wrong, but because they don't really know who you are and what you want. Only you know your own values.

One thing I have to note:

1. My value is only determined by myself but not other opinions.

Hm...There is another tough question. Do you really know who you are and what you want?

Focus

When I think of focus, I think of an example of a beam of light pass through a lens and focus to a point to ignite something.

I am not a very focus person. In work, I always want to jump from one method to another. That makes me miss the most important thing: to get the things done quickly or to get the right things done. When I am working on something, my mind is already on something new or the things I have to do later. That way of thinking always distracts me from focusing on what is important in life.

I totally have to learn this skill in my life. I know life can be stopped at any time. Life doesn't like a basketball or football game. You don't know when the refuree will stop the game. That is a part of the game. I should be more focus on how I play this game.

I guess life is not just working and providing the resources that our body needs. I think life has a meaning. Otherwise, why ain't we animals?

The one thing about focus NOT-TO-FORGET:

1. Reflect, set priority and follow through

P.S.: there is one exception, when I am watching movie, I am totally focus. I am so attracted to the screen of TV and the dramatic part of the movie. May be that's why I like movie so much. No, I mean great movie.

5 Things I've to Remember

Five things I have to remember:

1. Your value doesn't depend on other people opinion or views but who you are as a person.
2. Be authentic, say what you need.
3. Be motivated by joy but not fear.
4. If you get enough of what other people want, you will get what you want.
5. Reflect, set priority and follow through

My girl is a model!

Book Review - Killing the Sale by Todd Duncan

This book talks about 10 fatal mistakes most sales do. I believe that most sales people make mistakes because they don't really know that they are making mistakes.

For instance, most sales people believe that selling is a number's game. But in fact, it's not! The more sales plan you show doesn't mean the better and the more the sales you can get. In the book, it talks about that it is even more important to build good customer relationship than finding new clients. I had the same experience though. I remember I worked for a sales job and my supervisor taught me that it is a number's game. At that time, I totally believe in it. I was wrong. At that time, I thought when I worked harder then I get better result. So whenever I couldn't achieve the expected result, I blame myself for not working hard enough. I blamed myself that I had seen a movie in the weekend. I didn't even look at what I had done wrong or what I had to improve or change. As a result, most sales people are exhausted as they don't have their own life and they quit their sales job.

Some mistakes I made in sales:

• I don't ask for order.
• I don't prospect right people.
• I spend too much time on suspect.
• I didn't let go of the wrong people.
• I don't have a sales strategy.
• I don't do enough advertisement for myself.
• I don't position myself correctly.
• I don't follow through.
• I don't work consistenly.
• I don't use tools enough to help me.
• I don't ask the right and important questions first.
• I don't use my brain to think and reflect.

In concludion, I think I just have to be a better person and better decision maker to become a better sales person.